Sunday, July 20, 2008

10 things i like about me

So Lauren the poet did this on her blog, and I just spent several hours at work with a PMSing co-worker and I'm in a terrible mood so... Instead of bitching to anybody (at least outside of this little intro), here are ten things I'm glad I did in my life.

1) Went to the U of Arizona and spent my whole undergrad there. I never, ever thought I'd say that. But I think I would have never stuck with being a musician if I'd been under the pressure that any of the other schools (mostly music conservatories) I'd applied at would have put me under, and I also wouldn't have met many of the people who are important to me now. Including, if you want to really think through it, all of the people I've met in Chicago, any of my ex-girlfriends, all of the people who read this blog, and pretty much everybody I know except for Emily and people I met at Interlochen. I know there would be others, but for the most part I like the ones I have now :)

2) Became a vegetarian. I eat fish now so really I'm a pescetarian, and I used to be vegan, but anyway. I love to cook and it's really been something that's gotten me through some bad times, and I don't know that I would have gotten so involved with that if I hadn't decided to stop eating meat. Plus there's the whole animal rights thing...

3) Going to Alaska a second time. Seriously. I'm so grateful that I bought that ticket, because I feel like this trip was worlds away from the last and it's a place that deserves to be enjoyed and respected. It's made me kind of reconsider my goals and desires, and it was also probably the single most enjoyable vacation I've ever taken.

4) Adopted my cat, Skip. That little furball made me realize why people have pets. It's really awesome having him around.

5) Rediscovered my libido. A little personal maybe, but it was enjoyable and affirming to find out that yes, I do actually have a sex drive.

6) Read Gender Outlaw by Kate Bornstein. That book blew my damn head open, led me into the world of gender studies, and made my fascination with drag kings much more informative than it would have been otherwise. It changed the way I think about things, and that's awesome.

7) Started playing the viola. I don't think I really have to explain, but here's a short list: traveled a lot, got two college degrees, played with famous and amazing conductors, had life dreams that actually came true (so what if it sucked?), met many wonderful people, and got to experience so many musical rushes I couldn't even begin to count them.

8) Aggressively applied for a job in a flower shop last summer. That job kind of blew, but now I have a job that I like much better and an actual marketable skill, not to mention another potential direction to move in next. I'm thinking about taking some horticulture classes, because working with plants and flowers reminded me how fascinated I've been by them my whole life. That and library science are my short list of possible future moves.

9) Dated the three people I've been with. Although all three of my major relationships have not panned out, I've gotten so much from each of them. Some positive and some negative, but it had a major impact on who I am now and how I plan to live in the future, and I think that's important.

10) Moved into a studio apartment. It's only been three weeks and I was in Alaska for half of that, but I can already see that this was an important move for me. Just as I've been defined partially (and to too great of an extent) by the people I've dated and lived with, now I get to be defined much more by myself. And that is good.

So there's that. And I feel somewhat better.

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